Balls on head

Neill, wouldn't it suck to have your balls on your head? Just imagine. Hitting your head on the door; crumple to ground. Basketball lands on your head; crumple to ground. Thinking; crumple to ground. Rubbing your stomach and patting your head; crump...actually, that wouldn't be so bad. Wind would probably rock, unless it was cold; then your brain would get smooshed.

Deep thoughts inspired by this alien sketch, that looks like he's got a tight scrotum for a head.

Doug "feelin' the breeze" Williams

Artsy Fartsy

Dude, how goes it Neill? Hopefully good. You know what's funny? I used to be anti-digital art. I guess not anti, but I definitely thought it could never compete with traditional. I always thought it would be stiff and DOA. Of course this is way back in the late 90's. I think you were like 5 then or something. Anywho, so all my concepts were either pen, pencil, or marker. Like all of them. Then one day it all changed. One man made me grab my Wacom tablet and cry to the sky "ME TOO!" Who was this amazing man?

Craig Mullins

Good gravy the man is good. Since then I've seen tons of artist who wrangle more life out of their digital pieces than any of those old dead masters. Ok, so that was sort of dickish, but they are on par with those old dead guys.

So that leads to the above piece. I love testing and making new brushes. I love when flipping and twisting said brushes take the shape of a skull. I love turning what was basically a digital rag into a finished piece, or semi-finished piece.

I was heavily influenced by Nausicaa as a child. It was called Warriors of the Wind over here. I still love quiet scenes of characters walking around giant dead things. My fav scene from Star Wars as a kid was C-3PO walking past that huge skeleton in the desert. Ok, that's a lie; it's totally the last battle, or the cantina. Hammerhead is the shit.

You know if Lucas had gone for a Dinner with Andre film, and had Admiral Ackbar and Hammerhead talking to each other at a table while doing shots; I would have been happier with the prequels.

Well dude, hope shit with you is good, I honestly mean that.

Doug

WAIT! One more thing; there's a reason why Han should shoot first. He's a scoundrel. He's in it for the money, and that's it. So when he shows up at the fucking Death Star and saves Luke's shit, it's Gawddamned great. You cheer! Why? Because his character shows growth. It's on the same level of Luke's hero's journey, and it is all born out of the scene where he shoots FUCKING FIRST; THUS MAKING HIS APPEARANCE AT THE DEATH STAR MEANINGFUL!!

pant.....pant....pant....

Ahem. Food for thought.

Story telling

Neill, so dude, this is a changing point in my life. Time to start creating my own shit rather than constantly follow. I have a few things I've been meaning to start for years. By 'a few' I mean at least thirty. Some small, some bigger; but it's time. Time to start.

I love telling stories. I fucking love it. I have all these movies in my head. I put on music (usually soundtracks) and plot out entire films. I see the whole movie from beginning to end. The above image is work related, but made the same way. I was listening to James Horner's Aliens soundtrack (one of the best soundtracks ever) and pictured a scene with these two guys trying to see if they can start that old car. Unfortunately it trigger's the alarm which attracts zombies.

Nearly every image I make is based on some scene in my head.

Now, totally feel free to throw work my way. I'd love to do it. I'm attracted to talent and creativity, and you have that in fucking spades. SPADES! I'm just saying it's time to take this shit by the reigns. Make my mark. Because you never know when your time is up. Sometimes those lessons are taught to you in really shitty ways, and sometimes in really sad ways.

Doug

PS Copley, we're still good, right? Kevin James was an awful idea.

Missionary position

Real deal Neill; what's up man. Hope all is well. I had a pretty fan-fucking-tastic week, so things are good here.

So this was a quick wind down image, hence the black robe. I used to have an idea I liked for a comic project that centered around a group of alien missionaries on some human colonized planet. It was sort of the wild west meets Blade Runner meets The Mission. In the end the missionaries are not only there to help bring humans to the lord, but they also are trying to stave off an attack, by the aliens bosses. It's a little complicated.

Actually it's not complicated, I just don't feel like typing it all out.

I thought the idea of us teaching aliens about some religion (I wasn't sure which to go with) and then hundreds of years later, they have adopted it, and are trying to teach us what we had originally taught them. I don't know, something there.

I guess throw it on the fucking pile of Doug idea's that never go anywhere.

Although, I have a cool idea for that other thing I'm kind of working out in my head. A book with like thirteen or twenty illustrations, and little blurbs in the page corners about the music that inspired the scene. Self publish. What do you think? What about the rest of you lurkers? Feel free to post. I know you're watching....I know. Don't worry Neill, they're good kids.

Any way man, hope shit is good. Drink a beer for me, and have a good one.

Doug

Two in one day

Holy hand grenades Neill! two posts in one day? What the eff! That's right, nearly a free man. More art, coming down the pike. Is that right? Pike? Why a fish? huh. Weird.

Anyway, this is on top of an ooooooooold sketch I found in a hidden folder the other night. I quickly painted it up, like maybe twenty minutes. So, way back in like 2005 I saw this short called Alive in Joburg. It was by this guy who made another flick called Tetra Vall. Any way, I was so impressed I wanted to draw my version of those sunglasses wearing squid face alien freeloaders. I think I even sent one off to the company that had it in their show-reel.

Anyway, blast from the past.

Have a good one dude. Hey, ask Copley if we're still cool. Tell him the Kevin James thing was a joke or something.

Laterz

Doug Williams 2005 version

Piggy Ideas

Quick sketch of possible pig-like heads. Just dicking around.

So Neill, I think I offended your boy.

Sharlto and I were trucking along on the movie, and then I accidentally mentioned maybe having Kevin James in there for comic relief. Not the funny version of Kevin James, the Mall Cop version. Then, poof. He disappears. I suppose we played out the flick. It already has everything....literally.

Maybe he realized the massive under taking the film was going to be, and got cold feet. I don't blame him, the scale of this feature; wow. I think we would have paid for it up front, tons of product placement, but still; it would have been daunting to move forward.

At any rate, I should not have mentioned Kevin James. You know how Sharlto is, he's got a bit of a temper, and hates to share the marquee. It was foolish of me. Kicking myself in the arse. And so, just like that, Sharlto Copley disappeared like the man sized pixie he is. Back to Neverland...or South Africa, or wherever he comes from. Land of the giants? For me; our time together is a memory, one I will treasure forever.

Douglo Williamsopley.

The darkening

Neillios, bud; how goes it, meng? So, continuing on with my idea. That's the factory there. Working shit out in my head.

My big issue right now is monitor crap. It's dark on my Cintique, and super light on my laptop. So I darkened it on my lappy, but now is it too fucking dark? Ugh.

Anyway man, dude, I totally get why you hang with Copely. He's brilliant! Man, the movie that he and I are coming up with is amazing. No offense, but it's going to make any other movie look like a handy cam student project. Theaters will literally explode from the awesomeness. Movie projector 'click'--BOOOOM!!!

I can't give anything away, but let's just say that there's a special cameo by a certain woodland creature with sharp claws. But he's a man. Wait; I fucked that up. Anyway, it's going to be great. Snikt.

So, I asked who should direct, and I'm waiting to hear back from him, but maybe you'd be game? I mean if he passes on it? I imagine he'll be doing to much coke and strippers to want to bother with directing. I don't know though, maybe he can swing by the big and tall shop and put on some grown up clothes. He'd be good at it. Just lacks confidence.

So anyway, I hope he'll let me show the quick poster mock up soon. You're going to love it.

McDougle Williamson

Uncle Pappy

Quick idea, not final.

Dude. I'm starting to digg this dumb little idea I had.

Neill this shit is snowballing, and to the point that I'm not sure I want to share it with the masses just yet. Not because i don't like the masses, but I figure I might want to release it in book form, or comic, film? Shit I don't know. What I do know is that it's solidyfing in me brain nicely. The whole story structure is mostly worked out. It's a little rough, but shit, fairly complete. Usually I have scenes in my head, but the story falls apart when I try to connect them.

Hmmmmmnnnn.

Anyway, I'm in my final stages of my big super secret freelance gig. I'm super excited by it. Once that's done, I have a few other quick things to work on, and then I'm going to tackle this project. I'll post images and ideas for it, but just won't hand out the whole story yet. We'll see where it goes.

I will say; the main character has six nipples.

So does Matt Damon.

Doug

PS Copley; this doesn't negate the flick we're putting together. It's just different. A completely new story. Fewer vampires and Bieber, but just as much awesomeness.

Class 3 Announced

So...A bit of a plug. It's cool though, because I'm pretty proud of what I'm working on. Here's some linkage: 1up IGN Joystiq 1 Joystiq 2 Eurogamer Massively Destructoid and of course, multiple articles on our homepage; Undead labs. You can find the story other places too, but those are some of them.

I'm super excited for this.

So there's my plug.

Doug

Chappievolution

Sup Neill-dog? Hope things are going well on the flick, it sure sounds like they are.

Sorry for the lack of new shit on here. between the new gig and my super secret freelance, there isn't much time. Soon though, soon.

So anyway, I was uploading that freelance work onto my site last night (for back up reasons) and had some down time to make some quick art. Now, I get up at five in the morning, so starting a piece at midnight means that I have a half an hour at most to finish a pic. So I started this quick image as sort of a joke piece. Originally it was going to be this mutant guy with a Charlie Chaplin mustache (sort of like the creature in your Wired video), but I kept fucking up the face, so I covered it in that weird mask thing.

Then this story started forming in my head. I was listening to Jack Parow's Ek Wens Jy Was Myne and envisioning these scenes in my head. It opened with this video/ad/commercial of people having fun, hooked up to some machine by green wires attached to their heads. Lots of white, like a happy Wii commercial that ran into a United Colors of Bennington ad. Then when the song changes it cuts to the previously mentioned rich mutant fucker riding in his six wheeled limo. There's his driver paying bribes at checkpoints and poverty surrounding him. In the background massive ships are rising and lowering at some distant shipyard.

the camera follows the mutant guy as he walks into this massive factory. Inside are men, women and children working frantically building the happy head hookup machine from the earlier mentioned ad. So you can piece together that this guy runs the factory that is contracted out to build the machine that was in the ad. Basically like how those factories in China build Wii's, computers and Apple products at low costs and shitty working conditions, but sci-fi'd out to make them even shittier.

From there. I wasn't sure where the story would go. One idea had 'Chappie' the mutant boss trying to perpetuate a war, so he could continue getting cheap materials to make the green wired happy fun machine at a low cost. Got to keep cost low; right? Sort of pulling from the current situation in the Congo. Of course, Chappie isn't all bad. You'd see him rise from test tube and meat slaughter house (he was bread to be the meat for a McRib like sandwich), striving to be more than he was meant for, and rising to the top. Becoming a factory owner and shrewd business man.

Ultimately, his quest for lower profits and quick cash basically turns him into the meat processing plant owner he escaped years before. Uncaring, cold and calculated, justifying his actions with a 'That's business' message. Meanwhile, nobody else cares what happens at the factories, as long as they can jack in and live in a false fantasy land. Somewhere there would probably be a kid, one of the factory workers, who would end up being the center piece of the story or something.

Shit I don't know. I looked at the clock and it was twelve twenty three and my files had uploaded. So off to bed I went.

But then my little girl woke up and was hungry (she had a fever earlier in the evening and had fallen asleep/missed dinner), so we went out into the kitchen and ate yogurt until one thirty. To be honest, we had a great time.

Then I got up at five.

Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu....

Dougelton Williamson the III

Horn Tootin'

Neill, I am a fucking genius.

'Nuff said.

Doug

PS Hey Copley, where did you fucking go? Sorry; where did you fooking go? You can get in on this shit too. I accept checks.

You've got Space Fleas!!!

Uh oh dude! You've got the Space Fleaz!!! Space fleas can give someone the space crazies, and you my friend are space crazy. I mean dude, slow the fuck down! First you're announcing your actors, the the fact that you got a personal hero of mine, SYD 'effing MEAD to work on your shit; and now...a new fucking movie? Are you crazy?

Here dude, let me tell you a story. So way back when, before kids, I owned a Sega Saturn. I had been a Sega fanboy since my Master System (During those early years I also ended up getting the SNES and NES and, of course, a Genesis (Megadrive). But back then, I had very limited funds, so games were few and far between.). So here I am with my Saturn, when my Parents surprise me witha graduation present (Art School); an N64! Now, I was just about to start a new job, but had a week between school and my new job to do nothing. I filled with with conquering Golden Eye. Wait, this story is going to take way to long to tell.

Basically I ended up with shit tons of systems and games and could never give my full attention to any of them. Except Ocarina of Time. Oh, and the original Half Life. Good god that was a great game. Anyway, pull it together and focus. Focus on one thing. Try to block out Copley's insane tallness and the special riggings you'll need to make him look the same size as your other actors (especially the 4 foot 3 Matt Damon) and focus. Relax, focus on one thing. One thing....one thing...one thing. That thing, your current project, and it is...working with me.

That's right dude! I was going to post a tombstone with the words 'Doug Hopes and Dreams" carved on it when I heard you'd secured Syd Mead, but really what is so great about Syd Mead? Blade Runner? Please, I've seen tons of movies that look like Blade Runner, they just came out afterwards. Tron? Dude, that shit just came out, old Flynn/Young Flynn? Whatevahz.

Man...I can't do it. I can't pretend to not like Syd. I mean, I spent hundreds of dollars for a book of his. I stood in line at an E3 for nearly two hours hoping to shake his hand; only to end up getting out of line to catch a flight home. It's one of my few regrets. I briefly worked with a guy who knew him and said he is the nicest guy around. He's one of the few people I still hope to one day meet. I hear Syd Mead glows a slight golden color, and rooms feel warm when he's around. Syd Mead. Good fucking work dude, I mean that.

So Chappie, huh? I'm guessing it's a retelling of the Charlie Chaplin story, but....IN SPACE!

I could be wrong.

Have a good one dude, you're on fire lately.

Dougoblagon Williams

I be da' published!

Dude, how goes it man? I got to be honest, this is a self plug post. The above image is a work image, there's more art here, but it ties into what I'm going to talk about. What could this be? Zombies. I know, I know; a stretch.

So I was recently publish in a comic anthology called Zombie Terrors. I have a bunch of pics and a three page story I wrote called "Hate". It was a few nights, and really fun to do. Is it good? Can I write at all? Well, let's see what the fucking reviewers say:

Fangoria
“Hate” is drawn or painted in a way that I really love. It looks like it was done with oil paints and the story is a romanticized version of how much humans and zombies hate each other. By the end of the story you almost find yourself admiring how honest a zombie really is.

Zombie One News
“Hate” is a clever little 11-panel inner monologue written and beautifully painted by Doug Williams, whose quick twist ending will put a smirk on any reader’s face.

Zombie Bunghole
Wow! Finally a new Hemingway. Doug Williams is a genius. A complex shockingly abrasive look at our inner souls all wrapped up in three simple pages! This guy should be in films! If I had my way, he'd work with Neill Blomkamp (The best filmamker ever) on everything Neill makes. The two combined would make Tango and Cash look like Poop and Shit. Neill should fire that super tall circus freak Shartlo Copley (He has gigantism we hear) and punch Matt Damon in his pretty blue eyed face. Doug and Neill forever! Together they'd rule all entertainment, and sasquachop the shit out of Hollywood! 'Hate' gets 10 out of 5 stars!

So you see dude, people are diggin' what I made. Special thanks to Frank Forte for giving me the opportunity (and haveing a kickass name).

So Neill, pick up a copy and I'll sign it for you.

Have a good one dude,

Doug "Gatsby" Williams

Sigh...

Well Neill...it had to happen. I know I did the right thing, even though I hated doing it. I mean...there was just no choice. After Christmas, the wife's birthday, and everything else, there was just no way to afford it. Some choices are tough, and take hours to decide. Some choices remind you how old you are, and how you're just getting older. Some choices suck in the end.

I canceled my D-9 Exosuit order.

Neill, it's so fucking cool! So cool! Look at it here! I mean, that shit is tight! Oh well, such is life. I guess I'll just have to make my own out of yogurt cups and cardboard. Maybe a fork too.

So in other, more upbeat, news; this site is really cool! Art Blocks for Ghana. Lots of great artists on here, all for the benefit of mankind. That's cool and happy, right? Very grown up of people; taking time to do art for the sake of helping others. Oh and what's this?

Why, I did that. It looks a little better in person, because the paint is iridescent. OooOOooooh...shiny. Go to the site; other people took it more seriously, and turned out some amazing work. Fun to be included in this, it will help in the trial at the end of my life....a little. Thanks Danny!

Huh, I guess growing up isn't so bad. Although...I did mine in an evening, and really should have spent more time on it....so I guess I'm not that grown up.

Fuck I wanted that Exosuit.

Doug 'Tears of a Clown' Williams

Dammit!

This has nothing to do with this post. I just needed art.
Matt Dam-on. No.

Neill dog, how goes the wheelin' and dealin'? You secure Damon yet? Is it going to happen? Let me just say this; I hope not.

Whoa, whoa, whoa. Don't get angry. I love Matt Damon, great actor. There's just one problem, he's too good looking. I mean seriously. Who would ever buy that the guy would ever have any problems.

You know who would be good in his roles? ME! I mean I'm fugly, spies would actually be surprised if I was a secret agent. How about them apples.

Don't believe me?

Examples.

Matt Damon as Jason Bourne. Here comes the awesome pen fight. We all love it, but it's totally not realistic.

Matt Damon: "I'm going to fight you with this pen."
Bad Guy: "Oh....ok. I was just going to ask for your autograph....but I guess we could fight."
Matt Damon: "Oh...well, I'm not really a fighter....I'm just trying to figure out who I am..."
Bad Guy: "Dude, you're Jason Bourne! I've had my eyes on you for a long time."
Matt Damon; "Oh, It's all coming back to me. Dude let's just hold hands and talk about theoretical physics."

END SCENE

See, totally not real. Another example? No problem! How about True Grit?

MattDamon: "I'm a Texas Ranger."
Jeff Bridges: "Hold my hand, I want to talk theoretical physics."
END FILM

See, he would have ruined that movie in real life! Why are you not getting this? Ugh...another scene? Ponyo.

Matt Damon: (Flickering light in Morse Code) "Tell your Mom I love her."
Kid: (Flickering light in Morse Code) "She's swimming out to you."
Matt Damon: (Flickering light in Morse Code) "WHAT? SHE COULD DIE!"
Kid: (Flickering light in Morse Code) "She can tell how beautiful you are from your voice, even though your 2d form doesn't represent what you really look like. She wants to discuss theoretical physics with you....between her legs."

SHIT! He evens ruins cartoons. No seriously, did you see Titan A.E.? I know, I know; not his fault.

Man...picking on Matt Damon isn't as fun as Sharlto Copley. I guess I was excited to have this back and forth thing with Copley...but he disappeared. Now I'm sad. I miss him.

Sad Doug

Messing around...

Sup' G-Neill? Hopefully shit is going well for you man. Fucking around with some new brushes. Still like this one though, even though it's a quick sketch. Love me some Moebius, and all his pointy hats. The idea behind this fella' is he has all this social media projectors and relays. So he can express communication even faster than our old school way of talking. All symbols and abbreviatios compiled with actual old school chatty mouth moving.

Well...I'm at work, so I'll write more later.

Hope the movie is coming along and you secured Damon. He said some super nice shit about you on MTV's film blog thingy.

Doug OMG Willaims

Under the gun...

Neill, dude, sorry for the lack of updates. I promise more soon. Sort of under the gun at the moment. Biting off more than I can chew seems to be a common theme with me lately.

Hope you had a great holiday and happy new year!

Be back soon.

Douglebutt

PS Matt Damon was great in True Grit. It's too bad he and Copley have a blood feud.

What the fuck?

Dude, Neill, did you see that my last post got one comment. One comment? It's Greg Broadmore!!! I expected a deluge or 'wow's' and 'holy shits'. Maybe it's because I attacked Shartlo, which was unkind. I mean, I don't need to be that kind of blog. I can be a positive blog with lots of swearing. I don't need to attack people to make others giggle. I definitely don't want to be a wedge between you and Copley.





I should never have claimed that Shartlo has gigantism. That's a serious disease and untrue. I think. I honestly don't know. I mean he could have it, but I doubt it. What I do know is that he's a phenomenal actor.

Some people say that he's a fresh face, but I think it goes beyond that. He's just fucking good at acting. He seems genuinely likable, and it comes off as genuine. Wikus made you laugh and cringe, but you always sort of rooted for the guy. Even when he was a speciest douche. You knew there was a bit more to the character. Copley is talented. You can just fucking tell. It goes beyond acting. I bet he's got ideas and stories of his own to put on film. He might even be the next Neill Blomkamp.

So that's that. I honestly feel like Shartlo was fucked at the oscars. Yeah, I lower cased the fuckers. He really had an amazing breakout performance, and because he was outside the game, he got the shaft. I honestly and truly believe that. I definitely look forward to what he does next. He's handsome as well. Not Neill handsome, but handsome.

So to Copley, sorry for the attack. You didn't deserve it. This blog will be a kind, fun, safe place for you from now on.

But watch out for Matt Damon. He's a satanist.

Doug 'WTF? IT'S BROADMORE!' Williams

I'm closing in...

That's right. Greg fucking Broadmore.

The Plot Thickens, like jizz on a heater.

Obligatory work art.

Neill, I think someone is impersonating Copley; maybe. Check this out, he comments in the post below. I don't believe him. So I come up with a simple plan. I tell him to send me an image of himself holding a sign with my name on it, and he sends these images.

Really? This is the best this imposter can do? Come on. Plus, there's all the words; Mum, Post (In the e-mail), and a reference to Meet The Feebles. A film known only to New Zealanders and low-brow cinema nerds who loved Jackson before Lord of the Rings. (On a side note, that is one of the few films to ever make me gag. When the rat takes a bite of--HUUCGHN).

It almost seems as if there is more than one person in on this. It feels like a couple of people, possibly working together. Certain wording makes me feel like a bearded fellow might be behind this. Obviously the man...or men, have a rudimentary understanding of photoshop, and a passion for fonts a step above comic sans. This is why I believe it's; SHARTLO COPLEY!

Think of it, he's an actor. Of course it will seem like someone else. That's what he does, it's his gig. He's pretending to be someone pretending to be him. Why would he do that? Think about the scandal of a mega star celebrity trying to bring down a small town blogger. It's called David and Goliath, Shartlo, you should watch it.

What? It's in a book? Really? Huh.

Man, why you doing this Shartlo. I was realizing that my last few posts were kind of mean. I don't need to be Perez Hilton. I don't need success made on the back of ridicule. I was going to make a nice post about what a great actor you are, and how my favorite line from District 9 is a clever little "now that's clever", but instead you force my hand into a defensive position. I'm on to you Copley.

Neill, watch your back.

Doug 'Worried for Neill' Williams